Brian Kipruto stepped his feet at Samoei Boys high school at the time when my hormones were generating a thousand titillation to the young ladies around our school. Those funkies; especially music, drama and debate attracted a huge percentage of people like us, who were almost always academic dwarfs. When Brian joined us I saw a friend in him. I made him my bed-mate (we were pilots up to form three when he was made the president and he ascended and paraded his hard buttocks to the student council’s cubicle) some of which were places to hide stolen uniforms.
At times when chemistry had castrated me and mathematics licked me dry, while geography massaged my head, we sat on top of the pilot bed to make stories. At this particular time, it becomes proverbial that it is not only women who subscribe to gossiping, but this lucrative business is heavily invested in, by men. It would be 11 and apart from a little touches on literature; that Amani must have been a fuck boy in disguise (the way he was going to ‘tingisha kibiriti kusikia kama kuna njiti” must have been the inspiration behind Khaligraph Jone’s debut ‘nitakuja kukupiga stick, ntakuja kukupiga miti’).We would touch on Grusha Vashnadze and the lady in the stable who was termed as a voluptuous wench. This term is used to refer to ladies who have extremely expanded side hustles (hips) and enormous behinds, something that drive men to nuts. Haga tu.
Sometimes we would talk about our crushes. We would talk about how much concentration they had siphoned out of our minds during those biology practicals. And it was during such days that Brian Kipruto introduced Cheptoo to me (and the cube mates who must have been listening in silent mode).
The way words escaped his month made mine water. He described her as being smeared with beauty; that she was fine art perforated with gold dust. Her beauty was something that my namesy had never seen in the world and something (we listeners had never heard in the world). That there was something about this girl that made our boy become a common mwananchi and elect her to be his own queen. However much this was appealing, this thing made many of us wapenzi wasikilizaji envious, and always prayed to meet Abby Cheptoo one day and snatch her from Brian before he made other advances.
Years later, when the beautiful Cheptoo made her way out of Kapsabet girls, a school at the outer membranes of Kapsabet town, it struck us (especially me) that we will never meet her.But being the person I am, I Facebook-ed her, waved at her DMs, but never made advances of snatching her away from the canines of Brayo because I thought by then their love must have been strong and juicy.
When I met Abigael Cheptoo a few weeks ago I conclude that actually, there is something about her, that just like Hussein Bolt, drives men nuts (see what I did with those words-am a player). There is something about her face that dries my smelling sweat (I take showers once a week unless otherwise). She is a charming, ambitious and industrious lady (She is the current Miss Kenya Methodist University and this tells you even more about her sexy height that if she was to plant a kiss on your lips, man you will need to stand on the table or any other higher grounds). However, (allow me to be biased) contrary to the likes of Grusha, there is something about her athletic body that charms men to run to her arms. Furthermore, there is something about her smile that assures you that if she was your woman, you will never afford missing getting back home if she was the woman who prepares your meal, bathing water and makes your bed.There is something about her, that makes me feel I should snatch her already.But what about Brian? I even don’t know.